Mid - Autumn festival

This year mid - autumn festival I can say is not good as I expected. I can say that my expectation for this festival is not very high. I only want my family member can happy for this festival and I hope can visit my relative house during this festival but neither of this happen. My feeling while I write this post is sad, disappointed and feeling that are complicated. It is very uncomfortable.

This evening I heard that we will go and visit or relative's house and will held a BBQ party. I heard this I feel very happy and in my heart I think everything is just happen as I hope. But it does not happen as I hope. My parents say that we will held a BBQ but did not invite anyone. The thing that make me feel very sad is during that BBQ, I cannot feel any happiness during that time and my father just keep nagging. I can say that this BBQ I did not enjoy for most of the time.

The BBQ just end in 2 hours only, haiz. During clean up I don't know what happen and my father just get angry without any reason. Of course other members in my family become his victims. Actually I want to say him back but I afraid it will make things even worst so I just endure it.

After that, I know that we would not visit my relative this day just because my father get angry. How can this happen. So I did not say anything and just go into my room and sit in front of computer and watch animation. Normally, when I watching this animation I will laugh but today when I watch it I can't even smile. My happy mood is just like being sealed. My mother told me that this is the first time our relatives celebrate this festival in Ipoh. I know she want to go and visit but just because of one people and make others have to stay at home and doing nothing. This is not the mid - autumn festival that I want.

It is raining now outside and just like my feeling at this moment. I hope tomorrow will be a better day.