Just be yourself

Today I ask one of my friend: "Will you change yourself in order to get close to another friend or will you change yourself in order to avoid losing a friend." The answer she gave me really good and is the answer that I didn't think before. She is correct, when you change for your friends, just to make the person happy. But the personality that make the person happy is not the real you and when your friend know that you change just to make him/her happy, what will be your friend's feeling? Confirm will make both parties unhappy and more serious, maybe lost one friend. So, just be yourself.

Now, another question arise, if you know that your personality doesn't like by your friend. You are afraid of losing that friend, what should you do? I really have no idea about it. Sometimes I will ask some of my close friend that am I annoying you. I know most people will not answering the true answer but I really want a real answer from the bottom of your heart. Now, I'm really afraid I will lost a friend because of too annoying to you.
I really want to know what is my weakness and my shortcoming (e.g. too loud, too rude, etc). I know its impossible I become totally perfect in front of my friends, but please let me know so that I can try to fix my shortcoming that people really dislike or even hate.

Sometimes when I want to join into a conversation not because I "geh bo" or what, is I want to understand you all more so that have the topic to talk about. Maybe some people will feel I am too fragile or too sensitive after reading this post. But, this is real me and this is the place that I can speak the word and feeling in my heart.

Precious Moment Together With Friends

Yesterday badminton session is not just badminton for me, but is the session that we can play and share together. At that time, I just thinking playing but in the night, when I recall back, I figure it more than that. I also wonder why I will feel like this. This morning finally I know, this is because we all will graduate soon. Be precise is just around 6 more months. Time flies, from the first day at campus till now already 2 and a half year. From I have just 1 friend to have quite a number of friends now. Some are even my close friends where I can share my feeling, or ask for help when needed. The life in uni is different from secondary school life, totally different. Maybe during secondary school, most of us still not that mature yet but in uni, we all are almost adult, mind become more mature and comes from different places. Deep in my heart, I have a question to ask you all, am I really annoying you from the time you know me till now. But this question I really can't saying it out in front of you, but I really wanted to know. I got ask through IM but don't know why the message just cannot delivered. Is this fate?

Other than that, I also thinking what will I say to all my friends on the day we graduate @ convocation. I really cannot think of any words that can tell you all. After graduate, its very hard to gather you all again. So, in this 6 months, I will really really really appreciate every moment we are together.